There is an old Chinese tale about a woman whose only son died.
In her grief, she went to the holy man and asked, “What prayers, what magical incantations do you have to bring my son back to life?”
Instead of sending her away or reasoning with her, he said to her, “Fetch me a mustard seed from a home that has never known sorrow. We will use it to drive the sorrow out of your life.”
The woman went off at once in search of that magical mustard seed.
She came first to a splendid mansion, knocked at the door, and said, “I am looking for a home that has never known sorrow. Is this such a place? It is very important to me.”
They told her, “You’ve certainly come to the wrong place,” and began to describe all the tragic things that recently had befallen them. The woman said to herself, “Who is better able to help these unfortunate people than I, who have had misfortune of my own?”
She stayed to comfort them, then went on in search of a home that had never known sorrow.
Wherever she turned, in hotels, in cities, in villages small and large and throughout the land, she found one tale after another of sadness and misfortune.
The woman became so involved in helping others cope with their sorrows that she eventually let go of her own.
She would later come to understand that it was the quest to find the magical mustard seed that itself drove away her suffering.